Accompanied Journey

By Antony Huynh

When you think about your personal history, how well do you know yourself? How far back can you remember about your past? What do the people in your life remember about you? Sometimes your friends and family know more about you than you realize, and that’s exactly the case with me and my friend, Ichika. Despite knowing each other for about 3 years, we both have things that we still don’t know about each other. We even have some stories that could open ourselves up and change each other’s views.

In April 2019, I felt pretty lonely after school because I didn’t have a big group of online or real life friends. That was until I discovered an app named Amino. When I first tried it out, it felt different compared to other types of social media. It wasn’t just about posting photos, making comments and gaining followers, it had a system of communities, where people of a certain subject can talk with one another. That was when I ran into Ichika and some others in one of the chats. Although it was quite a chaotic meeting (in a good way), I enjoyed it along with him. From the meme talks, the roleplaying, some dumb topics that we discussed, As the weeks went by, many of our conversations would end up becoming a cherished part of our history.

Ichika: I remember doing a lot of Whiteboards and just talking.

Antony: Yeah I used to remember Karma’s weird conversations back then--

Ichika: Oh yeah, yeah! I know what you're talking about.

Having this one normal conversation with Ichika reminded me that our time on Amino had become a foundation of our best moments together. Many people we’ve been with have become embedded into our memories just like how we humans remember some parts of our childhood. We just can’t forget it.

What we can sometimes forget is how far we’ve progressed on something we’ve dedicated our lives to. In my case, it was art. As I worked more on it, I never seemed to notice how far I got with it until someone pointed it out. It’s pretty funny. You keep thinking it’s not enough but everyone else just keeps getting more impressed with what you’re doing.

Antony: Comparing my old art to now, what can you say for my improvement?

Ichika: I think it shows dedication. That you actually care about what you’re doing. I guess compared to other artists I’ve seen, it shows more care. I feel like a lot of people just don’t care about what they’re doing. They’re just doing it because that’s just them, or because they can.

Until he pointed it out, I never realized how far I've come and changed. It’s honestly shocking. One year you think you are just bad at it, the next year you’re just nailing it. Between last summer and this year, things have been just going up even higher. It’s amazing how something you never actually liked oddly becomes your favorite thing to do. I never gave up on my artwork even if I knew it looked bad. Heck, I didn't have any future plans for my artwork until people like Ichika began pointing out its potential, making me think it will become a timely thing I’d enjoy doing. Weirdly enough, it was a hobby that ended up helping me set myself straight on a career path. ABSOLUTELY UNREAL!!!

Motivation was also something that grew quickly over time, which was something else that took me by surprise. To this day, I don’t know what caused this sudden phase of dedication, but my guess is that something just clicked. Or maybe, it had something to do with my admiration for my friends. Looking at all of their individual art styles, especially Ichika’s, it made me visualize the world in a new look. Where everyone is different in their own ways, in which they develop in a certain way that’s personalized only to them. They don’t follow a certain teaching, they just go out on their own to make a path for themselves. And then I realized...I didn’t have to be what others are, I just needed to be myself. It’s just like looking in a mirror.

But I didn’t get this far alone. Whenever I was struggling with my art, I didn't really know how to seek help because looking on the internet wasn’t doing much. Then I turned to my friend Ichika. He was an incredible artist who had done works that inspired me and added up my motivation. Then I watched him ask others for help on his work. I was baffled, why would someone as amazingly skilled as him ask for help? However, scrolling through the comments. It all made sense. It wasn’t about reaching a certain level of perfection that would get you attention, it was about growing in your own way.

I went through everyone’s work inthe group, and looking at all of their individual art styles, especially Ichika’s, it made me visualize the world in a new coat. A world where everyone is different in their own ways, in which they develop in a certain way that’s personalized only to them. They don’t follow a certain teaching, they just go out on their own to make a path for themselves. And then I realized...I didn’t have to be what others are, I just needed to be myself. It’s just like looking in a mirror.

As I asked him for some advice and critique, it helped develop my art style into becoming something recognizable. It wasn't as if he told me that I had to draw a part of my art in a specific way, it was just some corrections, which I think makes a good example for being helpful. I probably wouldn’t be as patient or addicted with my artwork if it wasn’t for him.

Outside the subject of art, I didn’t really know myself as a person that well, in fact I’m pretty closed out to many other people in real life, because I just have a sense of fear whenever I'm near others. Being with Ichika turned that around, as our conversations on chatting platforms such as discord, made me feel more itching to be interactive. I’m sure that if I never met them, I wouldn’t really be who I am now, someone who was lost on his own priorities before, now finally set straight after finding an activity he enjoys doing thanks to the help of his friends.

But what I also learned from him is that you don’t really need to be more than a friend to someone in your life. You don’t need to give yourself a higher meaning for them. Just being a friend is enough for them, and it shouldn’t be a way to look down on yourself. .

I hope that I don't steer away from my path, because I'd be pretty disappointed in myself for giving up on my goals. Having friends helped me significantly on setting myself straight as both a person and an artist. Without Ichika, I probably wouldn’t even have tried to join any class involving interactions with other people. Or have a new idea of what being an artist meant. Art is a way for us to express ourselves, a way to visualize our imaginations, a way to make something of yours stand out rather than being perfect.

There’s no such thing as a certain level of perfection in art that is “required”. Everyone is different in their own ways when it comes to “perfection'' because it's not about impressing others, it’s about you. And there are people out there who are willing to help you shape up your own visions. Most of my art wouldn’t even be around if i haven’t tried reaching out to my friends.