What goes through the mind of a substance abuser

By Kathy C.

When discussing the topic of substance abuse, people often think, “Why can’t they just take one then stop?” or “What made them start using drugs?”

Drug and alcohol abuse can be an effect of many things, including stress, depression, mental illness, child abuse, sexual harassment and rape, childhood issues, peer pressure, bullying, and many more.

As a high school student trying hard to balance education and work, it often gets difficult to stay consistent and energetic while still making time for my family and friends. Eventually, it causes me to feel extremely stressed and drained, which leads to me questioning myself like “Why you can't get anything done in time?” or “Why can’t you make time for yourself and do the things that you like?”

According to Lauren Villa, in her article “The Truth about Drug and Alcohol Abuse in High School” from American Addiction Centers, “Not all youth will develop problems with drugs or alcohol, but mounting stressors may make it more likely.” Unfortunately, the feeling of being stressed isn’t something you can change easily because there simply isn’t enough time in a day to accomplish your workload and still have time for yourself.

Source: Credits to Iliara Urbinati, www.ilariaurbinati.com

When students are stressed, they will try to look for things to do to relieve the stress. When there isn’t enough time in a day to be productive with their assignments and take care of themselves, they are most likely to give up. Giving up usually leads to drug and alcohol usage to pass the time and stress. The reason for this is because when there is nothing to do, the day will seem longer, and you will start procrastinating on things like homework.

The particular reason for drugs and alcohol abuse showing up in children and teens are problems or events that show up when they are growing up. These events could be several things, like child abuse and neglect as children.

The Addiction Treatment Center in Western Pennsylvania, Silvermist, in the article “The Link Between Childhood Trauma and Addiction in Adulthood,” says that “The National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA) reports that two-thirds of the people in treatment for drug abuse reported being abused or neglected as children. There are multiple levels of physical abuse that can put children in harm’s way and lead to the development of drug or alcohol addiction later in life.”

When a child is abused and neglected while growing up, they might use alcohol and drugs as a blanket to keep them warm. The warmth that their parents never gave them. They crave stability and acceptance, which they receive from abusing drugs and alcohol. According to Silvermist, as of September 2018, 18% of mistreated and abused children resorted to drug and alcohol abuse. Whether intentional or not, these children grew up having to tend and care for themselves physically and mentally because their parents were on drugs and could not perform parental duties. I would like to believe that if these children were not mistreated when they were little, they would have a higher chance of not abusing drugs and alcohol.

Although we can never know what goes on in these kids’ minds, we can conclude that a high percentage of children who were not abused or neglected as kids can turn to drugs and alcohol because of peer pressure and bullying. A handful of kids and teens are bullied to the point where they need validation from other students to feel fulfilled. As a person who has seen this happen to many people, I can say that when kids want to fit in with their friends, they are most likely to fall under the trap of peer pressure.

According to Sarahlynn Lu, a junior from Evergreen Valley High School, who recently moved to the United States her freshman year, she started drinking alcohol because of peer pressure. “It’s really hard to say, it started off with a bit of peer pressure. My friends were like just try it, try a little you’ll like it. It gets really hard to stop once you get started.” Her friends pressured her into drinking the alcohol because they said it would make her “feel good.”

It was extremely hard for Sarahlynn to quit drinking alcohol once she started. It ruined her mentality and her relationships with her parents and friends. One night, when she got into an argument with her parents, she snuck a bottle of alcohol into her room and drank the whole thing while on a phone call with her boyfriend. Her boyfriend did not once tell her to stop. The following day she felt so drained, she couldn’t get herself out of bed. “I felt extremely tired, it took me several hours to get out of bed, I really thought I was dead. I couldn’t feel my body and it felt so cold. I was so scared.”

The feeling of abusing alcohol made Sarahlynn feel powerful, but when the high was over, and she was on the verge of death, she was terrified. She felt weak and vulnerable.

Source: Credits to Ilaria Urbinati, www.ilariaurbinati.com

Euphoria is an extreme, unrealistic feeling of physical and emotional well-being feeling. When Sarahlynn was feeling euphoric, she didn’t care for anything besides the happiness she received from alcohol. This caused her to fall extremely behind in school. She would show up to the first period, then ditch the rest of the day. In Vietnam, going to school was a privilege. You would have to pay a hefty amount of money to send your child to school. Therefore they didn’t care if you showed up to school or not. So, her parents didn’t know that she was skipping school because attendance wasn’t taken seriously. When she finally came to her parents for help, they were shocked because her parents weren’t close with her, she said.

When she finally decided to stop abusing alcohol, it had a life-changing effect on her. “Stopping alcohol usage did have a big effect on me. I had to stop attending school because of the feeling of withdrawal. I stopped doing sports and clubs. It felt like I stopped school for a really long time. I didn’t get professional help though, I was on my own.”

When she came back to school, she tried really hard to bring her grades back up. “I would definitely change the choices I made because I definitely felt weaker when I was drinking. It makes me feel weak when I think about myself in the position of being peer pressured,” she said.

Unlike Sarahlynn, who had to become sober by herself, many people tend to get professional help. Getting professional help means going to a recovery center, where they help you detox to get the drugs out of your system, then they help you stay sober by connecting your mind to other things other than the drugs. It's a hectic and challenging process, but there is a high success rate.

Sarah Wright, a former drug addict survivor and the director of Teen Challenge in the South Bay Area in San Jose, says that Teen Challenge has the highest success rate in existence, coming in at 78%.

According to Wright, “In my experience, people who end up with an addiction that lasts longer, is somebody who has some type of traumatic experience in their past, that has caused emotional trauma, PTSD, or someone who struggled with mental illness, causing them emotional pain on a day to day basis.” When people experience drugs or alcohol for the first time, the feeling of hurt is numbed; it leads to the route that lasts longer than the one time.”

Depending on the person, the feeling of overcoming substance abuse and recovering can be extremely filling. “For somebody who has traumatic experi. It, getting good counseling, or they need to have the vulnerability to humble themselves. They need to be ready to be sober, and need to have a desire. When they do the purpose comes back, peace and joy, they’re able to mend relationships that get broken. It can be fun at the beginning but it will get miserable. After overcoming the abuse, they will find happiness and relief,” she said.

Relapsing is extremely common for patients who struggle with mental illness and family or relationship problems. “Addiction is a disease, you can’t understand it if you haven’t experienced it. Relapse is part of recovery, addiction is something that has to be chosen everyday.” said Wright. She noted that substance abuse could stem many issues, including unresolved emotional trauma, abuse as a child, abuse of relationships, sexual abuse, mental illness, and depression.

A lot of teenagers have struggled with substance abuse in San Jose, and Teen Challenge was able to help a majority of them. Teen Challenge has never given up on a patient, even if they were to relapse. As the director of Teen Challenge, Wright’s motto is “As long as someone is still willing to make a positive change and become a better person, I will always give them a chance.” She says that helping a patient become a better person by overcoming drugs feels very fulfilling and rewarding. It helps her stay sober because she is giving back to the place that was there for her when she needed help. It gives her purpose.

According to the Discovery House, San Jose’s drug and alcohol abuse has increased by 40% since 2019. The reasons for substance abuse are varied, including stress, depression, mental illness, child abuse, sexual harassment and rape, peer pressure, bullying, and many more. There are many recovery centers in San Jose for adolescents and adults, including New Life Recovery Centers, Wellness Retreat Recovery Center, and Teen Challenge. Many people struggle with substance abuse, but not many get professional help, but the percentage of recovery is high when they decide to.

If you are struggling with substance abuse, please resort to the centers mentioned above or call SAMHSA Hotline at 1-800-662-4357.