for the thrill of it

By: Miguel Sanchez

There's a lot of ugly in this world, but sure as hell is a lot of beauty, just land and light, but to me it's…. It's life.

There comes a time in life when young teens become adults. Some mature at an earlier age than others, but in the end, we must all decide what we want to do with our lives. I myself have struggled to choose the route I want to go in life. I really want to travel and explore the world, but  I also want to stay here in San Jose with friends and family.

For the longest time, I've felt pressured to go to college, to be the best version of myself. Going to college is what seems like the best option for someone, It isnt for me; it's just not what I want for myself. I've grown to feel a deep connection to Nature and wildlife. I don't want to be in constant anxiety and stress; I want to be at peace with myself and one with nature.

 My entire life, I felt like I never had anyone actually to talk to; my family, friends, it all felt like they didn't care and didn't want to spend the time talking. But for some reason, being in the classroom of one of my teachers just felt so right, as if I had already been there before. His calming presence and caring nature helped me be myself and open up about my life.

My good friend and teacher, Mr. Fred Martinez, has actually been in a similar situation where he did not know what to do for his future, but was able to have people there for him so that he would know which decisions to make.

Martinez: Literally the same time frame where you are right now as a senior in high school. I knew I needed to go to school, but also didn't want to go to school because I felt like it was not my thing, and I think I felt confused because it was a weird, awkward time where I was in, and you could say my brother kind of forced me to go to college, and it was a little wierd but afterwords I felt like I kind of understood what Im doing.

 I'm currently stuck trying to figure out if I should live a life that would involve spending time with friends, family, and everyone I know, where I can hang out and get into trouble, or where I can be free and do what my heart yearns to do. With Martinez's help, I know that I will achieve my dreams. I just need to figure out how I will get there. One of the things I'm focused on right now is saving as much money as I can, so I can improve how much I save and spend, while finding a good first car.

Martinez: I do say, though, don't prioritize that vacation first; prioritize your education and your job first. Right? Because, in theory, you get decent money, and it helps you save a little more; don't think you won't, just know you will, it's not a matter of if, it's a matter of when. You will get to travel.

If I were to follow this route in life, I would have to get a high-paying job and save money fast while also studying to ensure I become smart enough to travel alone. Which is why I have had a conversation with Mr Martinez about making the right choice on where to go in life. He has helped me understand that sometimes, to do what's right, we have to be steady and give up the things we want the most, even our dreams. 

For me, that means putting aside my desire to travel and experience nature so I can focus on earning money and being with the people that I love. I know it will not be easy, which is why spending time here is what matters most to me right now, as memories are what make living so special. I want to spend time with my family and loved ones,

Martinez: You will get to travel, alright, now you can't because maybe you don't have a job, and that's ok, that's normal.

Because of Martinez’s guidance, I haven't had as much stress or anxiety. I have been able to be free and express myself more openly because He has taught me that life is too short to worry and that Love can sometimes mean letting go, even if it hurts.

I know. That after graduating, I'm going to work until I can travel and move elsewhere, but right now, I want to enjoy myself and my hobbies like buying my favorite action figures, watching movies, listening to music, and posing my figures because that's what I love to do. I see action figures as a form of art when they're displayed in dynamic poses, as they capture the essence of their movie counterparts right at the fingertips.